remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize