More tranny stories later!
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
