Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
handjob tips. give me some.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
These tits shall not be calmed
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize