Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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