it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
