these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
