She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I came so hard my ears popped.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
