Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
