i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
only if we run a train.
done.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
