My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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