Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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