I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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