this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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