i was rollin on her like bob the builder
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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