She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
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