the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
