My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
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