I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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