And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
