quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
