You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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