Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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