were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
