I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
