Duck Duck Cougar?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
