We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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