I don't remember. Are we still dating?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
