He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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