Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Randomize