There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
This couple is walking their pig around campus
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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