I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just googled if crying burns calories
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
