My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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