Whod you bang
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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