What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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