Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
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I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
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Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...