Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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