THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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