its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Bring me that man meat
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize