I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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