Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
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plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
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Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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