love makes seman taste better
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
