She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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