whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
