this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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