But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
