kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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