What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
