honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
