Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
