We're like a lot better than the average bears
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
